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THE DIARY OF A CHICK WHO WALKED AWAY FROM ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS (THE CULT)

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Go-Go Rach  once was a girl whose world was controlled by the idea that she was POWERLESS. After a chain of events, she realized she'd been lied to. Now she does whatever she wants, whenever she wants, with whomever she chooses to do it with.

Her blog chronicles the horrors she experienced in the halls of Alcoholics Anonymous (THE CULT) and the wonderful things she does now that she's escaped. *IF SHE BIT HER TONGUE ANY LONGER, IT WOULD BLEED!*

Her life is pretty GREAT.
#gogorach
#livelikeumeanit


Tuesday, September 27, 2011

DADDY DRINKS TOO MUCH BY KIMBERLY KINRADE

GUEST BLOGGER SERIES

Today's Guest is Author, Kimberly Kinrade
Yeah, I’m totally stealing this from Tom Chalfant’s guest post “Mommy Drinks Too Much” on this very blog just a few days ago. Or yesterday. I don’t know. I’ve lost time. But not because I drink. Nope. Not often anyways. I’m just scatterbrained. There’s probably a meeting for that now too, I haven’t looked.


I have some mixed experiences with AA. My first run-in with them occurred when my ex-husband (then my current husband) was forced by court to seek help for his drinking problem. (Given the ex status of our relationship, you can probably see what’s coming, but I’ll tell you anyways.) He had a DUI that needed to go away, so off to meetings we went.

Being the supportive wife, I went along. By the end of the meeting, I was jonesing for some hard liquor.  And I don’t really drink much. How are these whiny, mind-numbing, self-indulgent, narcissistic, woe-is-me meetings supportive of sobriety? I would think you’d need to be tanked just to get through one.

But, I NEEDED him to be sober. He was scary when he drank. Like choking me ‘til I almost pass out kind of scary. I write more about this in my book “Bits of You & Pieces of Me,” but suffice it to say this wasn’t ok with me, ya know?

So began our dance with what Rach calls the cult. And I see it. He went on and off. When things got REALLY BAD he went to a 30 day in house rehab program where I got to learn all about how none of this is his fault because it’s a disease. So while he’s drinking away our bank account I should feel bad for him.

Yes, I felt really bad for his poor disease as I was driving to the bar to beg for money for diapers for our 1 yr-old, while pregnant with our second daughter. My heart was bleeding.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think people with drinking or drug problems are bad. But I don’t believe they are helpless either. 

And I was tired of being the enabler. But how do you draw that line when lives and finances are so blended? I couldn’t let him suffer his own consequences for overdrawing our account, because really it was me and our kids who suffered the most.

And while we’re on the subject, tell me how it makes sense that bars in Montana accept CHECKS from DRUNKS to cover their tabs? He accrued hundreds of dollars just in bank fees for bad checks to bars in Montana, then was arrested for it!

And this was BEFORE he went to war as a combat medic.

The demons that possessed him before he left were only strengthened as if injected with steroids by the time he came home from the sandbox.

I clung to our marriage for 8 years, before finally giving him an ultimatum. Get help or get out.

I didn’t believe that traditional rehab would work. I’d seen the cult of AA. Replacing alcohol with meetings and cigarettes. Before his rehab stint he was at bars all the time, blowing our money on booze. After, he was at AA all the time, blowing our money on meetings and cigarettes.

He wasn’t healthier or happier, just less drunk.

So, in the end, he left. And I was free!

I am no longer shackled to this life of enabler. I learned a lot about myself, addictions, and addicts. It’s a vicious cycle and while AA does seem to have helped some people kick the initial habit, for long term health and growth it does not seem to be effective.

It’s just another addiction. Another surrendering of yourself to something outside yourself in order to feel better.

Well how ‘bout this? How ‘bout we look INSIDE ourselves for those answers. That power. We might be surprised at what we find.

Written by:
Kimberly Kinrade

Kimberly Kinrade was born with ink in her veins and magic in her heart. She writes all things paranormal and spends her free time with her soul mate, three children and two puppies. As an author and Marketing Director for Evolved Publishing, she's a busy woman. Check out her latest YA paranormal thriller/romance, Forbidden Mind, on Amazon, B&N Nook or paperback or Smashwords. "She reads minds. He controls minds. Together, they might get out alive." Find her on Twitter, Facebook or at KimberlyKinrade.com.

Kimberly is an amazing person who has been very gracious to me. 
I thank her from the bottom of my heart for more than you guys will ever know. xoxo


DeConstrucor's Comment In Response to LETTER TO MY "FRIENDS" IN AA (page above)

"Brav fucking O.....Standing O fucking Vation. Or perhaps the Charlie Daniels quote from the Geico commercial of "thats how you do it son"

That was incredible.

Reminded me a little of "the letter" at the end of the Breakfast Club (perhaps the greatest movie ever)

Keep it up, dont be afraid to kick them in the teeth once in a while.

Always remember that its the misfits, the rebels, and the troublemakers that are the ones that change the world."

He post the following video at the end of his comment.

Thank you, my friend.
I am both Flattered and HONORED.
*STINKIN THINKAS UNITE!*


*This Video is here to support Decon's Words, not OBAMA (or any politician for that matter, since I've never been allowed to vote) Sincerely, Go-Go Rach.